Monday, 28 April 2014

BDSMonday - Decision Making

It's BDSMonday! (And I'm not actually is spooky. Odds are that at the moment I'm on my way home from the Calgary Expo, where I will have met Mark Hadlow and Jed Brophy and hopefully not scared them. It's in the future for me right now, but it will be in the past for me when this post goes live. Whooooo! Oooohhh!!! <--spooky noises)


Today's question:

What is your opinion on Doms/Tops (etc) making decisions for their subs/bottoms (etc)? (This isn't some creeper coming up to a bottom at the bar, handing them a drink and saying, "I got this for you." There has to be a power exchange already in place.)

Is it all right for a Top to order their bottom's meal for them? To control all of their money? Is there a point that you feel the bottom has to be an autonomous, responsible adult, or can they surrender all of their power and decisions to a Top?

Personally, I really enjoy having meals ordered for me and things like that. (We usually don't plan ahead and I'm pretty choosy when it comes to food, so this doesn't happen very often!) Most decisions are made by me, simply because 1) I'm the choosier of the two of us, and 2) my Sir doesn't want to have to make all of the decisions. So it's still a power dynamic.

As for finances, we have a joint bank account. (It's my only bank account, and it had better be my Sir's because otherwise she's been holding out when we really could have used the money! :P). Small, day-to-day purchases are made whenever something's needed, though we may occasionally check with one another if funds are running low. We decide about larger purchases together, though the final decision usually comes down to me. I'm the household's butler--I pay bills, do taxes, and generally keep track of our money. (I also do most of the cooking, cleaning, and general household maintenance. I still tease my Sir for remarking one day, "Wow, the kitty litter is always clean! It's like magic!" Me: "...yes. Magic.")


If you're interested in doing a guest post for BDSMonday, please let me know! You can comment, or email me: tq.strange (at)

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