Saturday 14 February 2015

My Zombie Boyfriend - Valentine's Day Excerpt

It's Valentine's Day!

I wasn't sure what to get you, so here's an excerpt from My Zombie Boyfriend. For those of you just tuning in, My Zombie Boyfriend is about Edward, a medical student/necromancer, and his zombie, Kit. You can read more about it here.

This scene takes place soon after Edward and Kit  have sex for the first time. Bone is Edward's ex-boyfriend.


Valentine’s Day.

I had thought about buying Kit a box of chocolates. A teddy bear holding a heart. A dozen roses. A diamond.

I did none of those things.

Reminders of What Had Happened Between Us were suddenly everywhere, in the hearts and cupids decorating every surface. I felt as though, wherever I went, people knew Kit and I had slept together and were silently congratulating or judging me. Kit introduced me to a few of his classmates-cum-friends, and to my surprise, I liked them.

I hoped they liked me, too, and I waited for that infernal day to end so Kit and I could get back to the comfortable awkwardness we had been living in since our night together.

My concentration in class suddenly tripled. I hadn’t realized how much I had been coasting since I had found Kit, or how much I had missed my professors’ praise. I felt like I was coming out of hibernation and seeing spring happening all around me, and it was corny as hell.

I didn’t care.

When we got home, Bone was standing on the sidewalk in front of my house, smoking and leering at pedestrians and drivers as they passed.

I hurried him inside before he raised too many questions from my neighbors.

“Bone, what a pleasant surprise. Would you care for a drink?”

“Brandy, if you’ve got it. In coffee.” His voice was harsh with cold and smoke.

I wrinkled my nose. The fact that he was a smoker might have played a part in our separation. Health issues aside, I can’t stand the smell. “Just the coffee.”

He shrugged, as if to say, it didn’t matter to him one way or the other.

Kit was staring at Bone, warily. He had only met Bone once before, and under rather trying circumstances.

“Ah, Kit, you remember Bone. Bone, Kit.” That just sounded peculiar.

I was happy to have the distraction of making coffee, so I could turn my back on them for a moment and try to figure out why Bone was here.

“Yeah, sure. That hospital guy, right?”

“That’s partially why I’m here. So I’ll be more than “that hospital guy” to you.” Bone produced a rose and held it out to Kit, smirking. “I asked Edward if I could borrow you, and he told me to ask you. So here I am. Asking.”

Borrow?” Kit was so outraged, he could hardly get the word out. He shot Bone a nasty look, then turned it on me.

I held up my hands to show my innocence, and Kit and I had a brief, silent conversation. I told him no, of course!

You should have told me!

I didn’t think it would come up, or that you’d want to know…

I wasn’t at all surprised that Bone had such a…fascination…with Kit. Bone is heavily into death, and about the only sexual partner more death-related than a necromancer is a zombie. Still. That was no excuse for him to upset Kit, especially on Valentine’s Day. When we might, just possibly, have a thing. Whatever that thing might be.

“Bone, we’re kind of…ah…this is sort of a bad time.” I passed him a mug of steaming coffee.
He drank some. This is one of the reasons I’m convinced he’s not entirely human—no human could drink coffee that hot and still look as though butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth. “I can come back.”
“Not really the point. I mean, it’d be great to have you over sometime. We could watch a movie or play video games or something.”

And Kit could be conveniently absent. Though I would probably tell him to leave earlier and stay out later than when Bone was expected to be around.

“Here, why don’t I put that in a travel mug for you?” I snatched the coffee out of Bone’s hands, pouring it into a thermos for him. “You can keep that. I’ll call you. This is a bad time; did I say that already?” I drove him toward the door, opened it, and ejected him. Closing the door behind him, I leaned against it, letting myself slide down until I was sitting on the floor. I felt astonishingly rude, but he was gone, and Bone isn’t the type to take offence about social niceties, or the lack thereof. I would call him later, if he didn’t call me first. I was sure he knew Kit and I were now sleeping together and would feel the need to bother me about it. Which seemed like fair payment for throwing him out like that.

“Kit?” I asked, from the floor. He was wearing a pair of shoes I’d never seen before, which didn’t surprise me. They were grey leather and looked very good on him.

“Mmm?” He leaned on the counter and peered down at me.

“I like your shoes.”

“Thank you, Edward!” He sounded genuinely touched.

“Do you want to go out for dinner?”



“Valentine’s Day dinner? Like, a date?”

I shrugged, trying to copy Bone’s laissez-faire gesture and probably failing.

“Yeah, all right. If you think we’ll be able to find a place that isn’t packed.”

“I don’t care if we go to McDonald’s.”

“I’ll get my coat.”

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